Ship's Communications of the USS Rendezvous
In this Issue
Since the Captain's been a little busy this
month, you get to read my meanderings. It's hard to believe that
two months have passed since the last newsletter.
The Seventh Fleet is continuing to grow and progress. We're
already attracting the attention of other clubs in the area who
may be joining soon. The cooperation between ships is really
going to benefit all of us in the long run.
You'll get a chance to meet the crews of the other ships at
CONduit in Salt Lake City May 15–17. The convention has
moved this year. It's being held at the Salt Lake Airport Hilton.
To get there, get onto Interstate 80 as if you were going to the
airport. Continue to go west passed the airport and take the next
exit. The Hilton has a lake and fountain in front of it. One of
this year's guests is D.C. Fontana, a name that should be very
familiar to Trekkers everywhere.
If you have access to the Internet, be sure to check out the
Rendezvous' home page at:
www.usu.edu/~startrek/
Our former captain, now civilian (kind of), Stewart Hunsaker has
spent a lot of time upgrading the site. His effort has really
paid off. The site looks great. A special thank you to him and
the others whose contributions to the web page have made it a
great place to visit. Take a look and let them know what you
think.
The club is continuing to grow and progress. It's as strong or
stronger than it has ever been before. We're looking forward to a
great summer with fun meetings and activities. If there's
something special you'd like to do at a meeting or an activity
you'd like to hold. Please let one of the senior officers know.
We'll work it into the schedule if we can. We're all a part of
something special. Thanks for making it that way.
Cmdr. Ross Trowbridge
Executive Officer– USS Rendezvous
May 15, A-Day. We need people to staff the booth on the USU quad from 10:00 am to 3:00pm and we also need people to set things up prior to 10am.
May 15-17 CONDUIT in SLC. Guest stars are David Brin (Author), D.C. Fontana (Author), Steve Jackson (Gaming), and Arthur Roberg (Artist). Cost is $32.00 for the three days. Single day tickets can be purchased at the door. Rates vary dependent on the day.
June 12-13 Trip to Las
Vegas to the STAR TREK EXPERIENCE. The ships of the Seventh Fleet
and anyone else who would like to attend, are carpooling to Vegas
to see the exhibit there. Hotel rooms will be shared to reduce
cost.
All persons riding in a carpool are responsible for providing
$15.00 to the driver for fuel costs.
Back to Top
Captains Personal Log
Stardate 9805.08
I have just returned from five days on
the Holodeck. I left my communicator off, locked the door,
jimmied the computer so it could not find me, informed Commander
Trowbridge I was NOT to be disturbed (Unless of course in an
emergency), and took a vacation. Old time horses and wagons down
dusty roads, through spectacular scenery. It's amazing how
realistic the holodeck can make things seem. I have to admit
however, I need to visit the Doc. The smoke and dust has done a
job on me and left a bit of a
lingering cold.
Return to the reality of my position and responsibility as such
however was shocking. I got to my quarters to find 83 messages
awaiting me return.
My com pin has not stopped beeping since I left the holodeck and
the duties of the next month loom before me. However, the smell
of cedar camp fire, dry desert sand and horses still cling to my
jacket.
Activity on the ship has been high in the last few months with
many grand accomplishments presented in the ships crew. Commander
Steven Wall has brought the Explorer shuttle craft up to working
order and had her recently commissioned with the civilian crews
who helped to build her. Special
notice to be given to the following crewmen for the work on the
craft. Lt. Comm. Swift, Lt. jg Ben Wall, Captain CurT'IS
(amazingly he didn't break
anything. Note that Klingons can be quite skilled craftsmen.),
Comm Nilson, Lt. jg Baum, Comm Trowbridge, Lt jg Post, Lt.
Strawn, Lt. Chism,
Comm Adams, Lt. Hughes and civilians Pond, Hunsaker and Wall. My
apologies to any who may have been missed.
Lt. Laura Swift has been accepted into an International School of
Space Studies in France, Earth. We are hoping to see her finish a
Masters degree
when she is able to attend.
Lt. Derrick Hughes gave a presentation at our last staff meeting
on dangerous weather patterns, in particular tornadoes and the
damage they can deliver. His use of multiple types of visual
aides kept the crew interested in his choice of topic as all left
with more knowledge and fascination on this subject.
Lt. jg Jolynn Jeppson is being honored by the Seventh Fleet and
the USS Rendezvous for her outstanding actions in the area of
Service for the ship
and her crew. She has taken the initiative to organize and
provide meaningful activities for the crew. She has also
completed the political paperwork necessary to increase the
operating funds allotted the ship by the
University we are currently assigned to work with. For her
actions, she has been awarded the 1998 Service Award for the
Seventh Fleet.
Captain CurT'IS (I really never could grasp the Klingon names)
has taken quite a fancy to enlightening the crews social life by
actively taking part in many theatrical productions. His skill
with makeup can almost make him look somewhat human sometimes,
but I would not recommend anyone telling
that to him personally. Amazingly, the last production he was in,
he allowed himself to be beaten in a fight. Not something I
thought I would see happen, and I believe he quite enjoyed it as
well. Who ever said
working with Klingons is boring, obviously never worked with this
one.
Lt. Knowlton is still stationed on the icy Earth station of
Fairbanks Alaska. Her impressive efforts there, to catalog and
tag the sea life she is assigned to study, has earned her notice.
Starfleet has therefore
decided to award her with a two week vacation to the Earth
continent of Australia. Perhaps sometime in the future they will
decide she has been on ice long enough and return her to work
with the Rendezvous more closely, for now however, we are happy
to see her get two warm weeks.
As for other events of notice on the ship, well, it would make my
log too da....rn long to record them all.
Brindley out.
The life of an executive officer doesn't
leave much time for relaxation, but recently I was able to take a
weekend off and travel with my family for an overnight camping
trip.
We went to Antelope Island in the Great Salt Lake with the
Bridgerland Audubon Society. The area adjacent to the Great Salt
Lake is a haven for waterfowl and other birds. In addition, the
island is the home of the largest publicly owned bison herd in
the country, with over 600 animals. In addition to the bison, or
buffalo as they are usually called, the island is also home to
pronghorn antelope, bighorn sheep, and deer. Predators include
coyotes and bobcats. There are also a variety of small mammals
such as badgers on the island.
The area we were assigned to camp at was the Garr Ranch. This
ranch has one of the oldest continually occupied homes in the
state of Utah. In 1848, Brigham Young sent the LDS church's
cattle herd to the island where it would be protected from
predators, rustlers, and raids by Indians. The ranch was set up
to watch over this herd. Cattle ranching continued until 1981,
when the state purchased the portions of the island it did not
yet own.
The island is very interesting in many ways. Although it is
located in the middle of a salt water lake, there are more than
forty fresh water springs on the island. Geologically, the island
has some of the oldest and youngest rocks on the planet. The
rocks at the south end of the island are 2.7 billion years old.
In comparison, the oldest rocks at the bottom of the Grand Canyon
are 'only' 2.2 billion years old. Attached to these old rocks are
rock deposits only 10 thousand years old from when Lake
Bonneville covered the area.
We enjoyed several hikes and just enjoying being outdoors.
Saturday night, a geologist came and spoke to us about the
island's history and future. He had no sooner started to talk
when a great horned owl flew into the tree just behind him. The
group of bird watchers forgot the geologist was there for a few
minutes while they stared at the owl.
The owl's presence also upset the local population of Kestrels.
They screamed and dove at the owl, but he wouldn't budge. Between
that and several starling nests in the building the geologist was
standing next to, it was a very noisy evening. Later on, a barn
owl came out to see what the racket was. We were able see three
young barn owls in the barn (imagine that) next to the farmhouse.
Right now, the road to the ranch is closed to the general public.
It can only be reached by driving down a 15 mile dirt road. The
road is in the process of being paved, and next year will be
opened to the general public. But camping will no longer be
allowed.
To get to the island, take the Syracuse exit off I-15 and head
west. There is a $7.00 fee to drive to the island, $3.00 per bike
or pedestrian. Access to the island is by driving along a seven
mile causeway.
TOP TEN "NEXT GENERATION"
PRACTICAL JOKES
10 - While both are asleep, shave off Riker's beard and paste it to Picard's head.
9 - Tell Counselor Troi that Starfleet is giving serious consideration to replacing her with the Psychic Network.
8 - Steal LaForge's VISOR and rearrange the furniture.
7 - Tell Dr. Crusher that she is being sued for malpractice by Melvin Belli.
6 - The classic "fake cracked dilithium crystal in the warp core" bit. Keeps the engineering staff on their toes.
5 - Determine how to transport just the person while leaving his/her clothing behind on the pad. Then think up interesting ways that the technique might be employed during the upcoming diplomatic summit.
4 - Short-sheet Worf's bed.
3 - Replace the synthehol in Ten-Forward with the real stuff, thus introducing bed spins and hangovers to unsuspecting twenty-fourth century citizens. (Beats Ex-Lax in the chocolate fudge hands down.)
2 - Put a whoopee cushion on Data's chair so that he will have another interesting human experience to ponder.
1 - Tell the members of the crew that Wesley Crusher has graduated from Starfleet Academy with the rank of fleet admiral, putting all of them under his command.
Top Ten Selling points of U.S.S.
Enterprise.
10 - 10 year or 10,000 light-year bumper to bumper warranty.
9 - Discount on next starship purchase with each refill of dilithium crystals.
8 - Comes complete with bald captain, and blind engineer. (child genius extra).
7 - Conn and Ops side airbags.
6 - Holodecks are great for showing off. (NOTICE: Holodecks are NOT covered by warranty)
5 - Arboretum for when holodecks are malfunctioning.
4 - Separates into two pieces for easy storage
3 - Fall-away bridge module designed to isolate itself in a collision
2 - There are bathrooms. Honest!
1 - Built in system designed to protect characters with recurring roles.
Top ten signs found on the Enterprise
10 - On trash can in holodeck: "Thank you for keeping the holodeck litter-free."
9 - On shuttlecraft: "I brake for Klingon Birds of Prey"
8 - In Deanna's quarters: "Chocolate is my life"
7 - Anywhere: "Garage sale on deck 11!"
6 - In Ten Forward: "For good time call..."
5 - Outside Data's quarters: "Warning: aggressive Felis domesticus!"
4 - Anywhere: "Phasers don't kill people; Klingons do"
3 - In Beverly Crusher's quarters:
"My son is on the Honor Roll at Starfleet Academy"
2 "Daily Holodeck maintenance from 2 AM - 11 PM"
1 - Anywhere: "Have you hugged your starship captain today?"
Top Ten Surprises in "Star Trek
Generations
10 - Even though Captain Kirk dies, the toupee lives on
9 - Lursa got *uglier*!!
8 - Lieutenant Barclay's newest holodeck program: "Search and Destroy Doctor Bashir"
7 - Every ten minutes, Yakko, Wakko, and Dot are chased across the screen by the fat guard
6 - Explosion on "Enterprise-B" sets Chekov's toupee on fire
5 - Data debates which emotion chip to use- the PowerPC 601 or the Intel Pentium II
4 - Captain Kirk keeps the door to his cabin in Canada boarded in fear of Jehovah's witnesses
3 - Why does everyone's hair look great in this movie? It's Nexus Ribbon Hair!
2 - For fun, the crew goes bungee jumping in Stellar Cartography
1 - It's a h*lluva lot better than "Star Trek V"
Top ten Reasons to change the Uniforms
10 - So Riker's beer belly won't show so much
9 - They seem to accentuate the reflection on Picard's head
8 - The actors can hardly breathe
7 - they have to be washed several times a day they get so sweaty
6 - Any tighter and the actors might as well be wearing rubber bands
5 - If you wore one in a dangerous neighborhood you'd probably get killed
4 - They're made of the same stuff that pantyhose are
3 - There is no zipper
2 - They've been the same for over 2 months
1 - The actors' armpit stains show
Top 10 things Picard must do to lead an
away team
.
10 - Say to Riker: Hey what's that behind you!?! Then make a run for the Transporter room.
9 - Warn Riker that he will take away Riker's trombone privileges for a month.
8 - Make sure it is a hostile situation (i.e. Roga Danar episode)
7 - Pull out phaser and stun Riker.
6 - Bribe the writers, or if you want to be technical, bribe an admiral.
5 - Force Riker to ask Data a question that will take forever for him to answer.
4 - Set Riker up for a date with a woman so that Riker will be 'too busy' to object.
3 - Tell Worf that this is Thomas Riker, not Will, and that he must be taken into custody, and put in the brig...for his own safety of course.
2 - Threaten Riker that if he doesn't let him go, he will call him Number Two, instead of Number one.
1 - Blind Riker with the glare off his head. (I just couldn't resist.)
Top Ten Reasons to Believe the Ship Is
Falling Apart...
10 - Something seems out of place when Sonic runs by, spin-dashing the Romulan ship on main viewer.
9 - The only way to get the replicators to do their thing is by asking, "Pardon me, but do you have any Grey Poupon?"
8 - The warp core suddenly falls out of
the ship. All unfortunate "Engineering extras" are
blown out the resulting hole before the special doors can drop.
(Alternative: They can't get out BECAUSE the doors are down!)
7 Halfway to their destination, the crew watches helplessly as
the warp nacelles fly by on main viewer.
6 - Replicators' wiring gets crossed with warp control...they start creating anti-food!
5 - There's snow on the viewers and Riker has to go up and fix the antenna.
4 - Connected with the ship, Data suddenly blows a gasket. La Forge becomes frantic when he can't find any gaskets!
3 - Connection with the computer results in Data's thoughts being shown on the main viewer. (A combination of two main themes...?)
2 - A missed request by Picard results in a hole in front of his path. He falls into the Captain's Yacht, which then takes off at Warp 55.
1 - The ship's phasers, badly aimed, shoot first the main viewer, then the cameraman! (Oh well, it was a nice series...)
Rendezvous Saga
by Michael Baum
Marla frowned as she read the recent
transmission. "This is going to put us behind schedule. Good
thing they explained why to the rest of the fleet," she
though to herself as she reentered the bridge.
"Take us out of warp. We have new orders," she said as
the ready-room doors shut behind her. She could tell that the
crew was curious as to what was going on, but nobody said
anything.
"Plot in these coordinates and speed," she said as she
handed the helm the PADD she was carrying. "Gather the
Senior Officers to the briefing room." She delegated command
of the bridge as she left for the turbolift.
When the officers had gathered and were seated, she began.
"We're getting a new crew member," she started.
"Normally, this would happen at our convenience. However,
this instance has a few important factors to it."
"As you all know, our fighter wing has been a bit shy on the
strong central leadership," she continued as she passed out
PADDs to the other officers. "This new crew member has been
claimed to be quite possibly the best that his race has
encountered. Which brings us to the second important reason
behind the situation. He is not human. In fact, his race has only
recently offered their services to the Federation. To be honest,
I need a bit of advice on how to welcome
this new crew member."
The room was silent for a moment as those present considered the
alternatives. Then a discussion began as how to handle each of
the races that were believed to be considering an offer of their
services.
"Excuse me, Captain?" The room fell silent as the
science officer addressed the captain.
"Yes?"
"I may not be completely informed as to who the Federation
knows," admitted the science officer, a little shyly.
"But, I have never heard of this race before."
Eyes dropped down to the PADDs to reveal to the officers what
they had missed. "I was hoping it wasn't just me,"
stated Marla. "Now you understand the problem a bit better.
The Federation's fist contact
with them happened just before the offer of assistance was made,
when their delegation walked into the office of the President,
completely unannounced and unscheduled."
"That does present a problem. Knowing this little about them
would make it hard to properly greet them," stated Commander
Trowbridge. "I mean, we know absolutely nothing of their
culture."
"Yes. However, Starfleet has said to not worry too much
about impressing them, they've claimed to have already been
impressed by the Federation. But, Starfleet did also mention that
they would probably
also take notice of any such effort. The large concern of them is
to somewhat impress us of their abilities. Anyway, we should be
at the rendezvous point in about three and a half hours. If
anyone can come
up with any ideas, I would appreciate it."
Four hours later, the Rendezvous was waiting for the arrival of
the pilot. They had set aside part of the shuttle bay for him and
his ship, and had many of the officers and the fighter pilots
waiting for his arrival. It was evident that many of those
gathered were beginning to get a little bit nervous and more than
uncomfortable in their dress uniforms.
"Good morning."
Marla jumped. She wasn't used to people getting that close behind
her. She whirled around to see who it was, as the voice was
unfamiliar to her.
"Sorry I'm a bit late, but I was slightly unprepared as to
how to make my presence known. I didn't mean to startle you that
much."
"Must be the new crew member," thought Marla as she
scanned the area that had been behind her, where the voice had
come from. Marla frowned slightly. She could not see anybody
other than her crew, who
were also in the act of desperately searching for the new member.
"Captain!"
Marla glanced over at Commander Trowbridge as he spoke. Then she
glanced over to where he was pointing to see a strange ship
fading into
view in the reserved spot.
"Cloaking technology," Marla said.
"Interesting..."
"Close, but not quite," came the voice which had
startled her earlier. "Allow me to introduce myself. You
have been expecting me. I am Myqol of Cyaquu. I am your new crew
member."
Congratulations to Steve Wall and all those who helped bring the Explorer to reality. The ship has now been dedicated and is awaiting its first victims... er... students. This really is a dream come true and we look forward to seeing it in action.