Communication & Consent

Deciding whether or not to engage in sexual activity can be a big decision. Once you’ve made your decision, it’s important to communicate with your partner(s) what you are and are not okay with. This ensures respectful and consensual interactions.

Boundary Setting

Boundaries are guidelines, rules, or limits a person uses to decide what they are or are not comfortable with. By setting your own boundaries and respecting others’ boundaries, your relationships with others can be more pleasant and positive.

To learn more about your sexual boundaries, consider completing the “Yes, No, Maybe So” and “Ready or Not?” checklists.

Once you have identified your boundaries, it’s important to clearly communicate them. It’s also important to seek to understand the boundaries of your partner(s). Here are some tips for fostering respectful communication:

• Be clear and open about what you are and are not comfortable with
• Disclose what sexual activity means and does not mean for you
• Listen to your partner(s) reflectively
• Obtain consent

Consent

Ninety percent of survivors know the person who assaulted them. The first step to preventing sexual assault is understanding consent. Utah law states a person commits rape when they have any kind of sexual intercourse with another individual without their consent.

An affirmative agreement includes an informed, freely and actively given, mutually understandable exchange of unmistakable words or actions, which indicate an affirmative willingness to participate in mutually agreed upon sexual activity. Consent can be withdrawn or modified at any time, as long as such withdrawal or modification is clearly communicated.

Consent cannot be assumed based on silence, the absence of “no” or “stop,” the existence of a prior or current relationship, or prior sexual activity. There is no Consent when there is Force, Coercion, or Incapacitation.

Examples of Consensual behavior may include, but are not limited to:

• Verbal statements of “yes” or “okay”
• Head nodding
• Asking someone to engage in the sexual activity

Examples of non-Consensual behavior may include, but are not limited to:

• Verbal statements of “no” or “I don’t want to”
• Verbal statements of “I don’t know” or “maybe”
• Pushing someone away
• Resisting contact
• Shrugging or other uncertain body language
• Not actively participating in the sexual activity
• No response or silence
• Disengaging from previous Consensual behavior
• Force, Coercion, or Incapacitation