What Utah Mothers Can Do to Strengthen the Impact of Their Daughters

Utah is full of engaged, passionate individuals who frequently ask the question, “What can I personally and/ or professionally do to strengthen the impact of Utah girls and women?” To provide answers to that question, the Utah Women & Leadership Project (UWLP) hosted a series of “think tank” gatherings to collect best practices for various stakeholders interested in supporting Utah girls and women. This idea sheet is based on a 2018 gathering of 25 mothers who are raising school-aged daughters in Utah. With the knowledge that mothers are one of the most powerful influences in a girl’s life, this discussion focused on various topics, including culture, confidence and self-discovery, education, personal and social development, and resilience.

Culture

Cultural and social norms—both positive and negative—can play a substantial role in how girls and women develop their own sense of self, as well as their perceived roles in families, communities, and beyond. Mothers can use the following ideas to help girls and young women thrive in Utah’s distinct climate:

• Take part in positive cultural change by speaking out against social norms that limit or devalue girls.
• Ensure daughters have a wide variety of role models demonstrating many different life experiences; refrain from judgment and emphasize that women will use different paths to build meaningful lives.
• Emphasize the inherent value in unpaid care work and create environments where it is shared more equally among women and men, which will reduce the burden and distribute the rewards of such work.

Confidence & Self-Discovery

Girls are as confident as boys in their early years, yet as young as age eight this begins to shift as girls’ confidence declines. Mothers can play a critical role in helping girls and young women maintain and continue to develop confidence, as well as providing the space for them to discover their own interests and pathways:

• Teach girls explicitly to trust, think, and speak up for themselves, and then validate this behavior.
• Model the ability to be assertive, especially in uncomfortable or potentially dangerous situations.
• Listen as daughters share their opinions; allow them the chance to disagree and defend their ideas.

Education

Education (including higher education) is a key part of a woman’s overall wellbeing in many areas and throughout her life. Mothers can support their daughters’ educational success by doing the following:

• Nurture girls’ educational aspirations at all levels, talk them through a wide variety of options as they discover favorite subjects, and help them see how education relates to and improves daily life.
• Help girls develop broad, transferable skills throughout their school years, including reading, quantitative reasoning, critical thinking, problem solving, and communication skills.
• Ensure daughters develop financial literacy and understand the importance of preparing to support themselves and their families financially.

Personal/Social Development

In addition to formal education, there are many chances for girls to grow personally and socially. Mothers can facilitate and support this in various ways:

• Help girls experience the personal satisfaction, skill development, and leadership opportunities that come through service, whether in their families, at school, at church, or in the community.
• Teach girls to develop effective communication skills, including being responsible in how they talk about themselves and others (in person and online), and how to treat others with respect and generosity.
• Model the mental health and relationship benefits of practicing gratitude and maintaining an outwardfacing perspective.

Resilience

Resilience is a key component in overall life satisfaction and success, yet perfectionism (which is common among women at any age) is a deterrent to developing resilience. Mothers can use the following ideas to support their daughters’ efforts to build resilience:

• Model for daughters both confidence and vulnerability so they can see women don’t need to get everything right to still be valuable and successful.
• Reject the superwoman myth; help girls to see women don’t need to be “all things to all people.”
• Encourage girls to step outside their comfort zones, and encounter new people and perspectives.

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To learn more about What Utah Mothers Can Do to Strengthen the Impact of Their Daughters read the entire brief.